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Bargaining Bubble #17

NOTES FROM THE BARGAINING BUBBLE #17

by Bert Thomas, UCLA Representative, CUE BARGAINING TEAM
(A personal diary, not the Official Report)

UC DAVIS MEDICAL CENTER SACRAMENTO, July 11-12, 2005

"PLAYED AND BETRAYED" IN SACRAMENTO

A little bit heart-breaking, if you want to know. Even after a year of it, I'm just not used to dealing with people like this. Amateur human beings. And I'm old...I ought to know better. I don't think any of us saw it coming.

Hopes were high after the previous session in San Francisco. The State budget had just been signed. UC President Bob Dynes had just published an upbeat assessment of funding prospects for worker wages in his newsletter. The Berkeley Lab had settled with CUE. We believed that proposals CUE Chief Negotiator Amatullah Alaji-Sabrie had posted on the wall at the end of the San Francisco meetings were in line with University Negotiator Peter Chester's declared interests. He even agreed that they were "on the right track," and we assured him that we would seek CUE's Statewide Executive Board authorization to develop these proposals in an effort to reach agreement.

The CUE Executive Board had met two days prior to our Sacramento bargaining session to approve this direction, and on the first day of bargaining--after a short time sparring with a much reduced University team (Mr. Chester, Susan Wright of UC San Francisco, and pleasant, stoical Patty Donnelly of OP taking notes)--the teams agreed to go into caucus for preparation of CUE's new proposals on:

WRITING, PRINTING, RE-WRITING, RE-PRINTING...

At 2:00pm, the teams re-convened briefly to agree on a long list of contract articles where "Current Contract Language" would remain in effect. These would not require further negotiation, presumably, if an agreement were to be signed today.

We remained in caucus composing, re-wording and printing contract articles until 8:30pm. We had notified the University team that our teeny little printer was slow, out of ink, and that we were unlikely to complete the projects before the following morning. And thanks to the tireless efforts of Chief Negotiator Amatullah Alaji-Sabrie of UC Berkeley, Mary Higgins (UCSF), Shann Ritchie (UC Santa Cruz), Norine Shima (UC Berkeley), Lyn Kelly (UCLA), Alice Guillory (UCSF) with Cynthia Norman (UC Irvine) and Mary Jo Kelly (UC Davis) whacking away at the two computers, flash drives, and a printer that gave up at some point, and Melinda Gandara (UC Santa Barbara) hustling between the hotel's business center copier, computer and the caucus room...the job got done. Between admiring all this activity and dozing off, I think my main contribution to the enterprise was ordering coffee and treats and offering to hobble around the room naked...the mere thought of which alarmed my team-mates and spurred them to greater effort.

At 11:00am the next day, CUE presented Mr. Chester with proposals for:

The University team asked for a caucus to study these--mainly the Benefits article. They returned at 1:30pm, at which time CUE presented proposals for the remaining 3 Articles we'd been crafting:

IT'S ABOUT TO GET STUPID & UGLY HERE...
TIME FOR A TOUCHING CHILDHOOD MEMORY

When you were little, I bet there was a kid from up the street--a rich kid, usually--who was no fun to play with, except she had a bat and a ball and a big yard...or he had more dolls and dishes than you. (Don't look to me for gender stereotypes, I'm no fool.) And remember how this sniveling little putz/princess was always threatening to take the ball-and-bat/dolls-and-dishes and go home if they didn't get their way? Remember? And if you were lucky, you had parents who explained to you, in loving terms, that these "spoiled little snots" would "get the crap banged out of them" one day...but in the meantime, the "precious little farts" would have no true friends, would grow up selfish, bitter, and creepy, feeling sorry for themselves, whining ("mewling and puking" I think Shakespeare called it), and still hate themselves after many years of therapy. Better to let them hang out with their own kind, your Mom said... better than constantly begging your Dad to go over to their house and kick their butts.

O, and then to have to meet them as "adults"...for behold, one of them has turned out to be your bully boss. Alas, they're now too old--and so are you--for an honest and direct butt-kicking, which seems so clearly indicated. Now it must be done with "labor negotiations" and lawyers. You can still apply your boot to their bunda, in a metaphysical sense, but it's never going to be as satisfying as an honest contact of shoe leather with squishy, pretentious bum, you know?

At this point, let me refer you to the official CUE BARGAINING REPORT #8 (at the CUE website, URL below) for a more objective report than this is likely to be.

PETER WORKS ALONE

At 4:00pm, when the University team returned from its caucus to consider all we'd laid before them, it was down another member. Susan Wright had gone, leaving only Mr. Chester and Ms. Donnelly, his note-taker. Mr. Chester was working solo, in effect. It was all up to him, and he handled it, by golly...just like that kid from up the street. A gambler would call it: overplaying your hand.

LABOR-MANAGEMENT MEETINGS: "We're concerned that employees must treat management with respectful, fair treatment..." (Excuse me?)

REHABILITATION/REASONABLE ACCOMMODATION: "You've removed our language about the University's 'defenses'..." (Yeah, we did... "defenses" against disabled workers.)

UNIVERSITY BENEFITS: "A rural subsidy for Health Benefits (where a less costly HMO is not available--in Santa Cruz, for example) is not OK with us." (Roughly the same as advice offered up in our San Francisco meetings... that people with low pay "should consider finding a job at another campus.")

WAGES:

WILL THE REAL UNIVERSITY PLEASE STAND UP

After roughly 20 minutes, at 5:10pm, Mr. Chester produced multiple copies of a WAGES counter-proposal that was neither responsive nor bore any apparent relation to the CUE wage proposal we'd just given him. It was at this moment we knew we'd been had. I'll wager one of my important body-parts that this "counter" had been growing cold in his briefcase the whole time, prepared well in advance of our Sacramento meetings. And I remember thinking to myself at the time: This is all about the Chester family vacation! This is the elaborate scenario concocted by Mr. Chester in order to put the best spin on his failure to negotiate with this union, declare his oft-stated intention to seek impasse (in a quick memo to his boss)...and take the wife and kids to "Didneyland!" Whoopee. This entire bargaining experience with the University has been like "X-treme Didneyland"...like bargaining with Cruella DeVille. And Goofy.

And sure enough, next came the Impasse-Song...sing along everybody: "We are trying our best to get an agreement...we think we are at impasse...we're preparing for declaration of impasse." Badda-bing, badda boom. It's a small world after all.

CUE's Amatullah assured Mr. Chester that we would oppose this action with every resource at our disposal, and she proposed new bargaining dates to take place at UC San Diego. He said he would get back to us.

Three days later, he did. He faxed us a letter at CUE State Headquarters...and my, what a fine letter it was. Self-righteous and self-pitying, he began by expressing his "disappointment and continuing frustration with CUE's inability or unwillingness to make our negotiation sessions productive." From beginning to end (2 pages later), this Assistant Director of Labor Relations whined and complained that he'd had to wait for our proposals (as we have had to wait for his), and then when he'd got them they weren't what he wanted...and if he didn't get what he wanted he was going to file for Impasse with PERB. (And take his dolls-and-dishes/bat-and-ball?) Three days later, he sent us ANOTHER letter saying he was going on vacation (See? Damn, I love when I'm right!) August 2 thru 16, and likely wouldn't be available for his vision of "pre-impasse mediation" till after that date. He copied all of us: his boss, Executive Director Howard Pripas (who must be wondering by now why he's still in this mess with CUE when the Berkeley Lab settled with the union a month ago...Lab Negotiator Bill Elkins just looks better and better, owes Pete a thank-you card)...his "University Bargaining Team" (dang, who would THAT be?...I might be wrong, but it's my impression that people who've served on his team don't much like him, either)...and Labor Relations Managers system-wide, poor dears, who are only confused by his professed victimization at the hands of this recalcitrant and unreasonable group of CUE women.

"YOU'RE ONLY AS TALL AS YOU STAND" (Phil Ochs)

Frankly, I'm proud as the dickens of these recalcitrant and unreasonable CUE women. And I can't imagine a less suitable University Bargaining agent than...well, you know.

Think it's time to put a shout out to Judy Boyette. She's the University's Associate Vice-President of Human Resources & Benefits...Peter Chester's boss' boss on the org-chart, higher than Howard Pripas. Ultimately, "relations" with the University's workers are her responsibility, and her boys don't seem to be getting the job done. She's been a little disengaged lately what with having to take bullets for UC before the state Legislature--Senator Jackie Speier...(pop, pop, pop! Where's that info on UC's "cost-savings for staff turnover?" pop! pop!)--and replace a few key people in the troubled HR food chain...I'm just wondering if she's embarrassed enough yet. It's all on your watch, Madam...all on your resume. Like to help out a little?

The upshot is:

And, of course, the University's Negotiator wants to go on vacation. Well, dang, Pete...so do we.

(Oh, that's right...I'm laid off...I'm ALWAYS on vacation.)

FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WORK Un-CUE-ed

Can't bring myself to grind anybody about joining CUE anymore. If you don't see the importance of it, or you just don't like joining stuff, it's all the same to me. Joining is cheap, effective, and easy...And it entitles you to run for office soon in new statewide and local elections, which I hope lots of you will do. You can now JOIN CUE ONLINE at: http://www.cueunion.org/membership_info/membformweb.pdf
Fill out the form, print, sign and mail or fax it. Trouble is, if you don't sign up, your employer thinks you don't care how you're treated. Or paid. But whether you're a member or not, if you need help here at UCLA Local 4, visit our website (below) or call our mighty Organizers:

Unity is Intelligent. Fun. And Powerful.

--BT
(Bert Thomas, CUE's UCLA Bargaining Representative)
7.30.2005
All previous "NOTES FROM THE BARGAINING BUBBLE" are available on the web.

Or get your Bubbles at the UCLA website.

http://www.cueunion.org/bargaining/2004-2005/bubble17.php        07-January-2009 05:11:28
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